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Post by maruf on Oct 9, 2004 1:04:51 GMT -5
This is a good post to start this board off, and perhaps can serve as a reference point.
The Social System in Islam
Introduction :
The Social system in Islam is concerned with men and women, and the regulation of the way they interact with each other, whether in the private or public arenas.
There has always been much confusion among people in the west as to the roles that men and women play in life. In the past, women were seen as inferior beings to men, and even being compares to animals and regarded as 'without souls', or just items of property. And in the present day, womens movements and organisations struggle against the establishment to achieve the same status and rights as men.
These kinds of conflicts arise between men and women, beacuse it is left to human reason to define what are the nature and intelligence of men and women, and what roles they are supposed to play in life. However, it is impossible for limited human minds to understand fully the intricate nature of men and women, and their different emotions and characteristics. As a result of this, erroneous ideas arise about how men and women should interact with each other. Their roles remain undefined, and the result is chaos in society.
Many problems stem directly from this lack of clarity, whether concerning the roles of men and women in relationships, in families or in the workplace. This is why there is discrimination against and oppression of women, family breakdown, sexual harassment, prostitution, child abuse, homosexuality - the list of the consequences of an ill-defined social system is almost endless.
Men and Women in Islam
Islam defines very clearly exactly what are the roles of men and women in life, and gives detailed guidance as how they should interact with each other in every sphere of life. These definitions and roles come from Allah (swt) the Creator of human beings. As a result they perfectly accord with human nature and there is no scope in Islam for either men or women to be left to oppress or descriminate against each other.
Mankind is regarded as consisting of human beings, who have the same instincts, like the survival, spiritual or pracreational instincts, and organic needs such as the need to eat, sleep, breath etc. They share these regardless of their gender. As such, men and women are both creations of Allah (swt) and with this respect are absolutely equal in status. Islam defines the purpose of life for human beings as being purely a worship to Allah (swt).
"I have not created jinn and man except as a worship unto me." [TMQ 51,56]
This worship is fulfilled by living in obedience to the commands and prohibitions of Allah (swt), and the extent to which a person has done this will be judged on the Day of Judgement, to determine whether they are to gain the reward of Paradise or the punishment of Hellfire. This applies equally to both men and women, with neither having any preference over the other. In the eyes of Allah (swt) men and women have equal status. Allah (swt) says : "And their Lord has accepted of them and answered them, 'never will I suffer to be lost the work of any of you be you male or female, you , you are members of one another.'" [TMQ 3, 195]
It is acknowledged however, that Allah (swt) created man and woman with a different fitra (nature) which gives them different roles to play in life. This is because there are some attributes that are exclusive to men or women, that cannot be shared by the other; for example, women bear children and breastfeed them, but while men are physically stronger, they are unable to do these. One of the many errors found in the man made system, is that 'equality' has taken the same meaning as 'sameness.' Thus, women and men are forced to compete with each other to fulfill the same roles.
The shari'ah of Islam prevents this. In some areas, which are not gender specific, men and women follow the same rules, as in the prayer, the giving of oaths or the fasting, except where there is an acknowledgement in the differences of their nature - so in times of menstruation, the women is given a permit not to pray, and when pregnant, the woman need not fast. But in others, which are gender specific, men and women have different roles to play and rules to follow, e.g. motherhood, fatherhood or breastfeeding. Thus instead of competition between men and women, there is harmony and tranquillity.
Objectives of the Social System :
There are three main objectives of the Social system in Islam. These are :
1. To define the roles of men and women
2. To organise the relationship between men and women and to solve the problems that arise from this relationship.
3. To regulate the family structure. All the rules and laws which human beings are subject to in order to fulfill these objectives are defined by the shari'ah. Some roles are unique to men and women and some apply to both. These are called "Al-Takhlif Al-Shariya."
The MAN
A man can take different roles with regard to his relationship with those around him. Islam defines different rights and duties for the man depending on which capacity he is acting in. Some of the roles he could have are as :
1. Grandfather 2. Maternal/ Paternal Uncle 3. Father 4. Brother 5. Son 6. Husband 8. Maternal / Paternal nephew 9. Unrelated man.
Some examples of the different rights and duties encumbent upon the man depending on his capacity are :
a) The father must provide food, shelter and clothing for his children, until such a time that they are mature, and able to support themselves, after which his support becomes a charity.
Evidence: Aisha (ra) narrated that Hind bint Utbah came to Rasul Allah (saw) and she said, "Oh Rasul Allah, Abu Sufyan is a miserly man and I have nothing from him except what I take for myself." The Prophet (saw) said, "Take what is sufficient for you and your child with justice." Kitab al Umm, Imam Shafi'i
b) The son is obliged to obey the mother or father in those areas which are mubah (permitted) and are the right of the parent, e.g. to serve them or look after them, and is recomended to obey them in areas which are the choice of the son, e.g. who to marry, what to wear etc. It is forbidden for him to obey his parents if they order him to disobey Allah (swt). Evidence : "And we have enjoined upon man to be good to his parents. In travail upon travail did his mother bear him. And in years twain was his weaning : (Hear the command) 'Show gratitude to Me and your parents : To me is (your final) goal. But if they strive to make you join worship with me things of that which you have no knowledge, obey them not." [TMQ 31, 14-1]
c) It is forbidden for an unrelated man to gaze at a woman with lustful intentions. Evidence: Jarir ibn Abdullah reported, "I asked Allah's Messenger about the sudden glance (that is cast) on the face (of a non-Mahram). He commanded me that I should turn away my eyes." Muslim
The WOMAN
The woman too can take different roles. Her duties vary depending on which capacity she acts in. Among the roles that a woman can take these are some of the important ones :
1. Mother 2. Maternal/ Paternal Aunt 3. Grandmother 4. Sister 5. Daughter 6. Wife 7. Maternal / Paternal neice 8. Unrelated woman
Here are a few examples of what some of these roles may entail:
a) The mother has more right of obedience and respect from her children than the father. Evidence : Abu Hurairah related that a man came to the Prophet (saw) and asked, "Oh Rasul Allah, which if all the people is best entitled to kind treatment and good companionship from me? He answered, 'your mother.' The man asked, 'Then who?' He said, 'Your mother.' 'And after her?' He replied, 'Your mother.' 'And after her.?' He replied, 'Your father.'" Bukhari and Muslim
b) The daughter needs the permission from her wali (guardian), who is usually her father, to leave the house.
Evidence : Baihaqi narrated that the Prophet (saw) said, "It is not permissable for a woman who believes in Allah and the Last Day to allow someone into her husband's house if he is opposed, or to go out if he is averse."
c) The maternal aunt has more right of custody over her young nephew or niece, than any other relation apart from mother and father.
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Post by maruf on Oct 9, 2004 1:06:29 GMT -5
Evidence: Muhammad (saw) said : "The Khala (maternal aunt) has equal rights after the mother." The hadith was regrding custody af a child. Each role that the man or woman may fulfill has its own details and explanations. However, by fulfilling the roles that each has with regards to the other people around them, harmony will prevail within the family structure. Disputes which may arise will be solved by the shari'ah, whether they are within the family structure, or in the society as a whole.
Principles of the Social System
The main principles which preserve the relationship between men and women according to the Islamic shari'ah are:
1. Men and woman must cover their awrah. 2. Men and women are segregated, and mixing between them is allowed only in specific areas. 3. It is not allowed for an unrelated man and women to be together in a secluded place (Khalwa). 4. Men and women must lower their gaze towards each other and preserve their modesty. 5. Marriage is a valid institution for unrelated men and women to have intimate companionship with each other. Marriage may be dissolved by divorce. 6. It is not permitted for a women to travel alone for more then 24 hours. 7. Islam defined the roles of motherhood, fatherhood and children.
Covering the Awrah
Awrah is the term used by Islam to indicate the areas of the body on a man or woman which must be covered up in the presence of other people. This is an act which preserves the modesty and dignity of those who conform to it. There are different degrees of awrah, and the extent to which they must be covered depends on the relationship that the Muslim has with the people around him or her.
The dress code of the man :
The awrah of the man can be divided into two categories :
1. Awrah Ghalida (hard awrah) : this encompasses the private parts and the back side.
2. Awrah Khafifa : this encompasses the other areas from between the navel to the knee.
The Awrah of the Man to another Man :
It is forbidden for the man to uncover any part of either of these parts of his soft or hard awrah in public, or in private when other men are present.
The Awrah of the Man to the Woman :
The same applies when the man is in the presence of any woman, including his near relatives.
However, it is permitted for a man to show any part of his awrah to his wife.
Evidence: Abu sa'id al-Khudri said that the Prophet (saw) said, "A man's awrah is between his navel and his knees."
The Dress Code of the Woman :
The Awrah of the woman is divided into two areas :
1. Awrah Ghalida : Hard Awrah. This is between the navel and the knee.
2. Awrah Khafifah : Soft Awrah. This is all of the body except for the face and the hands.
The Awrah of the woman to a man:
The soft awrah must be covered at all times when the woman is in the public areas or when an unrelated man may be able to see her, like the street or the market-place. The clothes that she wears cannot be of a nature that they are tight, and reveal the shape of her body, as this does not constitute the adequate covering of her awrah. If an unrelated man has looked at even as much as one hair on her head, then he has seen her awrah, and has committed a sin.
If the woman is in the private places, like her home, but is in the presence of her male mahrem (nonmarriagable relatives) or other women, she must cover her hard awrah, but may show her soft awrah.
Thus, she may for example, breast feed her baby in such a place.
The only person in front of whom the woman can show all of her body, including the hard awrah, is her husband.
Evidence: Ayesha (ra) narrated that Asma, the daughter of Abu Bakr came to the messenger of Allah (saw) while there were thin clothes on her. He pproched her and said, "Oh Asma! When a girl reaches the menstrual time, it is not proper for her that anything should remain exposed except this and this. He hinted at her face and palms." Abu Daud
Al Tabarraj - The adornment
There is a specific dress code that the woman must conform to when she is in the public areas, as well as covering her awrah. This concerns the issue of adornment. She must wear outer two outer garments :
1. Khimar - this is a head covering which conceals all of her hair, and reaches down to cover her chest. Evidence:
2. Jilbab - This is a barrel shaped outer garment which covers the whole body, and does not reveal the underlying shape or definition. This may be in one peice or two pieces.
As well, the woman is forbidden from wearing bright colours or any style of clothing that will attract attention to her. This applies for jewellery, make-up, or anything which may make a noise when she walks. However, if she wears make-up or clothes which do not attract undue attention, she may wear these in public.
In the private areas, while in the presence of other women or her maharim (non-marriagable relatives), but not if in the presence of unrelated men, she may wear whatever clothes and make-up that she chooses, as long as they conform to the Islamic conditions (like covvering the awrah, not imitating the clothes of the disbelievers).
Evidence: "And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and be modest, and to display of their adornment only that which is apparent, and to draw their veils over their bosoms, and not to reveal their adornment save to their husbands or fathers, their husbands fathers, their sons, their husbands sons, their brothers of their brothers sons, or their sisters sons, or their women, or the slaves whom their right hand posesses, or male servants free of physical needs, or small children who have no sense of shame of sex; and that they should not strike their feet in order to draw attention to their hidden ornaments." [TMQ 24,13]
"Oh Prophet, say to your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers that they let down over them their jilbab (over garment); this will be more proper that they may be known, and thus they will not be molested." [TMQ 33,53]
These are some of the aspects of the social system, as relating to the woman or the man in their individual capacities. However, the shariah gives details about the rules regarding areas where men and women interact with each other.
Segregation between Men and Women
In Islam, the basic principle of the interaction between men and women is segregation. This means that in all areas of life and in all places whether private or public, contact between men and women is generally prohibited. Many evidences establish the principle of not mixing between the sexes, and there are many ahadith which clarify that this is the case in both public and private areas:
Abu Daud narrated that the Prophet (saw) said, "The best row for men is the front row, (furthest to the women's row) and the best row for women is the back row and the worst is the front row (just behind the men)."
Ibn Umar said, "The Prophet prohibited men from walking between two women." Abu Daud.
Abu Daud narrated that the Prophet (saw) saw men and women outside the mosque moving side by side in the crowd. He stopped the women saying, "It is not proper for you to walk in the middle of the path, you had better walk along the walls."
This means that the Muslims should avoid contact with members of the opposite sex, whether Muslim or not, as a general rule. However, there are exceptions to this general rule, where the mixing or interaction between men and women is permitted in certain situations.
For example, it is permitted for men and women who are Mahrem to each other to mix freely for any purpose that Islam permits. As well, there are certain areas where it is permitted for non-Mahrem men and woman to interact with each other, such as for the purpose of Da'awa (invitation to Islam) or education. However, the type of mixing that can occur here is not free, and is restricted by the shari'ah to be within certain guidelines and boundaries, and the Muslim must be sure to understand these before any type of mixing takes place. The ahkam (rules) to do with mixing also vary with regard to the kind of place in which the mixing takes place.
The Public and Private Life
In an Islamic society, there are two areas of where men and women come into contact with each other, which are quite separate from in their descriptions and the ahkam (rules) which relate to them. The nature of the interaction between people in them may involve the mixing among men, among women, and between man and women. These are :
The Public Areas - These consist of areas wherein anybody can present without permission, e.g. the mosque, the streets etc.
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Post by maruf on Oct 9, 2004 1:06:56 GMT -5
The Private Areas - These are areas where permission is required to enter them, such as houses. In such areas, it is forbidden to enter without permission, or even to look inside.
Sahl ibn Sa'ad narrated, "A man peeped through a round hole into the dwelling place of the Prophet (saw) while he had an iron comb with which he was scratching his head. He (saw) said, "Had I known you were looking (through the hole) I would have pierced your eye with it (the comb). Verily, the order of taking permission to enter (a dwelling place) has been enjoined because of that sight (that one should not look unlawfully at the state of others." Bukhari
Islam defines rules and laws which regulate the relationships between men and women in each of these spheres.
The Private Life:
This concerns the conduct of people when they are in the private areas. Here, the principle is that mixing between unrelated (non-Mahram) men and women is forbidden as a general rule. However, the shariah gives permit for mixing to occur under certain special circumstances. In all these cases, a woman must have a Mahram (non-marriagable relative) in her presence.
The areas are :
1. Medicine : It is allowed for men and women to mix for the purpose of seeking medical treatment.
2. Studying Deen : It is allowed for men and women to be present in the same class if the purpose of their mixing is learning about Islam.
3. Marriage : It is permitted for men and woman to be present in the same place for the purpose of performing or witnessing of celebrating a marriage.
4. Food : Men and women may eat together in the same place.
5. State Arrest : In any issues involving the affairs of the state, it is permitted for the police on the authority of the Khaleefah, to enter into a private place where women may be present, if this is required for them to conduct their business.
6. Duress or Compulsion : At times of absolute necessity or emergency, such as earthquakes, war or hurricaines, the necessary mixing is permitted for men and women in order to remove any danger or threat.
The Public Life
This concerns the conduct of people when they are in the public areas. Here again, the principle is that mixing between unrelated (non-Mahram) men and women is forbidden as a general rule. However, the shariah gives permit for mixing (in the sense of presence in the same area) to occur under certain special circumstances. In all these cases, it is not a condition that a woman must have a Mahram in her presence.
The areas are :
1. Mosques : Men and women may be present in the mosque at the same time, when these are used for the purpose of worship or other permitted activities which happen there.
2. Markets : Buying and selling may require a man or a woman to be involved in transactions with members of the opposite sex. In such cases, this type of mixing is permitted.
3. Hospitals : Within a hospital, it may lead to male and female staff and patients coming into contact with each other. As long as the reason for the interaction is related to the treatment of the patient and the running of the affairs of the hospital, then mixing is allowed.
4. Universities : For the aim of studying and education, it is permitted for men and women to be present in a public place like a university or school.
5. Streets : These are areas where it is inevitable that men and women will be present at the same time. This is permitted from Islam, but if any contact between them is deliberate, then it is forbidden. So, to purposefully walk on a side of the street where members of the opposite sex are walking is Haram.
6. Factories, Shops and Offices and Companies : It is permitted from Islam for both men and women to be involved in business and other areas of commercial life. Thus, if they are involved in any of these fields, and their work entails communication with members of the opposite sex, they may do this as long as the nature of their meeting is strictly regarding the business at hand.
7. Other places : These includes areas such as parks, airports, stations, farms etc. The presence of men and women together here is allowed from Islam, as long as the purpose of the gethering is within the bounds of shari'ah, i.e. the nature of the mixing is necessary.
In all these cases, where men and women are present at the same time, there must not be free mixing, where both sexes are mingling with each other. Rather, the men and the women must be separated, such that for example, the women are in one side of the room and the men are in the other side. The general rule is that any contact between members of the opposite sex is minimised as much as possible.
Thus, for example, in the trains or buses there would be separate areas for men and women.
In any case, the activities which are occurring must be halal (i.e. permitted) in nature. Accordingly, mixing between non-Mahrem men and women for the purpose of amusement, gossipping or entertainment is strictly prohibited. Thus issues such as boyfriend/girlfriend relationships, dating, or enjoying leisure and company with unrelated women is haram.
Khalwa - Seclusion
Khalwa relates to the presence of a non-Mahrem man and women being on their own together without the presence of a Mahrem or any other person. This could happen in a private place, or a public place. In either case Khalwa is forbidden from Islam, and both the man and women involved are sinful.
Khalwa in a private place : This could occur in any place that requires permission for entry, such as a house or bedroom in a residence building.
Additionally, if a Muslim woman enters a private place, where any unrelated men are present, she must have with her a Mahrem such as her father or brother for her presence there to be permitted from Islam, even if the situation there is not one of Khalwa. Should she be in such a place and a non-Mahrem man should enter, it becomes Fard (obligatory) for her to leave immediately if she has no Mahrem with her.
Khalwa in a Public Place : This could occur in any public place whose nature is that no other person people would be likely to pass by or come there. Such a place would be in a forest or an isolated room in a university.
Evidence : Muhammad (saw) said, "If a man and a woman are alone together in an isolated place, then the third is Shaitan."
Bukhari narrated thath the Prophet (saw) said, "No man should stay with a lady in seclusion except in the presence of Dhu-Mahram." A man stood up and said, "Oh Rasul Allah! My wife has gone out intending to perform the Hajj and I have been enrolled in the army for such and such a campaign." The Prophet (saw) said, "Return and perform the Hajj with your wife."
Lowering Gaze and Modesty
Part of the provision of maintaining the dignity and honour of men and women in Islam is in the regulation of the way they are regarded by each other. It is forbidden for the Muslim man to look at any woman with lustful intentions, except for his wife.
The same is true for a Muslim woman with regard to other men. Rather, the emphasis is on lowering the gaze away from members of the opposite sex at times when they are present, like in the streets or the market place.
"Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty, that will make for greater purty for them, and Allah is well acquainted with all that they do. And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty." [TMQ 24,30]
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Post by maruf on Oct 9, 2004 1:07:38 GMT -5
Evidence: Jarir ibn Abdullah reported, "I asked Allah's Messenger about the sudden glance (that is cast) on the face (of a non-Mahram). He commanded me that I should turn away my eyes." Muslim
This reflects the principle that the way that Muslim men and women view completely different to the way of the west, where women are seen as sex objects, and respect of both men and women in this context is almost non-existent.
"And the believers, the men and women, are friends of one another, they bid to honour and forbid dishonour, they perform the prayer, andthey pay the alms, and they obey Allah and his Messenger. Upon them Allah will have mercy." [TMQ 9,71]
This aspect of the Social system of the Islamic state will prevent exploitation of women in pornography, or the use of their bodies as an enticement for people to buy products. Additionally, in the media as a whole, whether on television, magazines, newspapers or films, neither men or women will be portrayed in roles where they reveal their Awrah, or involve in activities that are forbidden from Islam.
Thus the sexual bombardment from the media that is faced by people in the west, and the images of men and women that this builds in the mind, will be absent in the Islamic state.
Not Travelling alone for more then 24 hours
It is forbidden for a Muslim woman to travel on a journey which lasts for more than 24 hours, unless she is in the presence of a Mahrem. It is the role of her Mahrem to ensure that her safety, honour and welfare are protected.
Evidence: Muslim reported that the Prophet (saw) said, "It is not allowed for a woman to travel for a day without a Mahrem."
The Concept of Maharim (non-marriagable relatives) One of the conditions of marriage is that the partner must not be from the forbidden categories.
The Maharim of the man include : his mother, the wives of his father, the two grandmothers, his daughters, his granddaughters, his sisters, his paternal and maternal aunts, his great aunts, his nieces, his wives mother, his mothers by breastfeeding and their mothers and daughters.
The Maharim of the women become clear given the opposite understanding of the maharim of the man given above.
In all these cases, while it is forbidden for to marriage to occur between them, it is permitted for them to mix freely in the private and public areas. This mixing can be for the purposes given above with regard to the non-maharim, as well as for entertainment or gossiping etc., as long as the nature of the mixing does not transgress that which is laid down by shariah.
Evidence: "Forbidden unto you are your mothers, and your daughters, and your sisters, and your father's sisters, and your mother's sisters, and your brother's daughters and your sister's daughters, and your foster mothers, and your foster sisters, and your mothers) -in-law, and your step daughters who are under your protection (born) of your women unto whom you have gone in - but if you have not gone in unto them, then it is no sin for you (to marry their daughters - and the wives of your own sons who spring from your own loins. And it is forbidden unto you that you should have two sisters together, except what hath already happened of that nature in the past. Lo! Allah is ever Forgiving, Merciful." [TMQ 4, 23]
The exception to the above, is that the sister in law of a man cannot be married by him while he is still married to her sister. However, even despite this, he can not mix freely with his sister in law as he can with the other maharim. Similarly, the woman cannot mix freely with her brother in law.
Evidence: Aqabah ibn Amir narrated that the Prophet (saw) said, "Do not go near women when they are alone." A man from the Ansar said, "What about the husbands elder and younger brothers?" The Prophet (saw) said, "Intimacy with them is to be avoided as death."
Relationships and Marriage (Nikah)
Islam recognises that one of the basic instincts that appear in men and women is the urge to procreate and feel attraction to members of the opposite sex.
Unlike monastic religions, which condemn sex as 'sin of the flesh', relations between men and woman are seen by Islam as normal and perfectly acceptable. However, it forbids the sexual excesses of the liberal west and thus removes the dangers and problems in society which such so called 'freedom' inevitably entails, like single parent families, unwanted pregnancies and abortion.
"And among His signs is this, that he created for you mates from among yourselves, that you may dwell in tranquillity with them, and He has put love and mercy between your hearts. Undoubtedly in this are signs for those who reflect." [TMQ 30,21]
Intimate relationships between unrelated men and women of any kind are forbidden outside the framework of marriage. This ranges from everything between 'socialising' with members of the opposite sex, until zina (fornication). Adultery is forbidden and punished severely, and any forms of sexual deviency like homosexuality, child abuse of incest are similarly forbidden.
"Do not come near zina (adultery of fornication), for it is a shameful deed and an evil, opening the road to other evils." [TMQ 17,22]
Marriage
Marriage is highly recomended in Islam, with men and women being encouraged to marry as soon as they are able (i.e. physically mature and capable of supporting a wife). It is in fact seen as an act of worship, and every act of fulfillment between husband and wife is a charity.
Anas (ra) narrated tht the Prophet (saw) said, "When a man marries, he has fulfilled half of his religion, so let him fear Allah regarding the remaining half."
Marriage is regarded as a friendship between men and women, as opposed to a partnership. The objectives of marriage are two :
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Post by maruf on Oct 9, 2004 1:08:09 GMT -5
1. To enjoy the company of a member of the opposite sex.
2. To have children thereby guaranteeing the continuity of the human race.
The contract of marriage is called Nikah, and it is a contract between a man and women of which all the conditions must be fulfilled for it to be correct and valid. These include:
1. Offer and acceptance 2. No compulsion or Duress 3. Two witnesses 4. Wali Amr (guardian of the bride) 5. Payment of Mahr (dowry) from the man to the woman 6. The man and woman are not Mahram to each other 7. The woman is not in her 'Iddah (waiting period) 8. The man and women are eligible for marriage (e.g. woman is unmarried)
The Muslim woman must only marry a Muslim man, and it is forbidden for her to marry a man with any other belief. However, it is permitted for the Muslim man to also marry a non-Muslim woman from the People of the Book (Jew or Christian), provided that they are chaste and unmarried.
"Lawful unto you in marriage are not only the chaste women who are believers, but chaste women among the people of the Book revealed before your time, when you give them their due dowers and desire chastity nor lewdness nor secret intrigues." [TMQ 5,5]
Within the framework of marriage, the Shariah has defined different roles and duties that men and women have. They complement each other perfectly, such that the life between man and women is filled with harmony and tranquillity.
Rights and Duties with Marriage:
"Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given the one more strength than the other and because they support them from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient and guard (in the husband's absence) what Allah would have them guard." [TMQ 4,34]
Ibn Umar narrated, the Prophet (saw) said, "Each of you is a guardian and is responsible for his ward. The ruler is a guardian (over his people) and the man is a guardian of the members of his household, and the woman is gurdian and is responsible for her husband's house and his offspring, and so each of you is a guardian and is responsible for his ward." Bukhari and Muslim
Aisha (ra) narrated that the Prophet (saw) said, "When a wife spends food of her house without spoiling, there is for her its reward for she gives away, and there is also reward for her husband for what he earns, and the like (reward) for the storekeeper - none of them diminishing anything from the reward of another." Bukhari
These evidences, among others, define the basis from which come the understanding of the rights and duties of the husband and wife to each other within the framework of married life. These are outlined below.
The Husband :
The main duties of the man are :
1. The guardianship of the wife and children : this means he must ensure their security and protection, and must always act in such a way as to safeguard their interests.
2. The maintenance of his wife and children : He must spend from his own means to ensure that the basic material needs are provided for them, which includes bringing her all she needs to fulfill her duties as a wife. His wife is not obliged to give him any of her own money for this purpose, even if she is wealthy and he is poor. However, she may do so if she wishes.
3. Shelter for the wife and children : The husband must provide adequate housing for his family.
The main rights of the husband from his wife are :
1. Obedience and taking permission : The wife must obey her husband in all areas which are permitted from Islam, like to serve him or give him comfort. Also, the wife must take permission from her husband when she wants to leave the house, or when she wants to invite people into the house.
2. Divorce : It is right of the husband to divorce his wife is he is unhappy with the marriage. Also, if the husband dies, or divorces his wife, she must observe the 'Iddah (waiting period) before she can marry again. In the case of his death, this is four months and ten days, and in divorce, it is when three intervals between her menstruations have finished (as long as she is not pregnant).
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Post by maruf on Oct 9, 2004 1:08:29 GMT -5
3. Looking after his money and children : The wife must ensure that the children are properly cared for and educated with knowledge of Islam and that the husbands money is spent in a reasonable way.
4. Custody of the Children : It is the right of the husband that if his marriage ends, he takes custody of the children after they have reached seven years of age.
The Wife
The main responsibilities of the wife are :
1. Obedience and taking permission of her husband.
2. Looking after her husbands money.
3. Welfare of her husband : She must ensure that her husbands needs are taken care of.
4. Looking after the children.
The main rights of the wife from her husband are :
1. Companionship : It is the right of the wife that her husband gives her companionshp and maintains good relations with her.
2. Spending and shelter : The husband must maintain her and shelter her, and give her anything she needs to fulfill her role as a wife. This includes providing things for her which she can use to adorn herself and make herself beautiful.
3. Khul (Right of divorce) : The wife can ask for separation from her husband is she is unhappy with the marriage. There are three resons for which she can do this : a) He harms her directly, e.g. beating her, b) He harms her indirectly, e.g. not providing for her or her children, c) She hates him.
4. Custody of the children : It is the right of the wife if the marriage ends to have custody of the children as long as they are below the age of seven. From these descriptions, it can be seen that the details of these rights and duties for both men and women complement each other perfectly. In Islam, there is no issue of struggle for rights, or disputes between the roles that each fulfills. These are all defined by Allah (swt), so obedience to them means that men and women are freed from oppression and dominance by members of the opposite sex.
Indeed, Islam obliges that husband and wife make the utmost efforts to keep a beautiful and cooperative relationship with each other.
Abu Hurairah (ra) reported that the Prophet (saw) said, "The most perfect of the believers in faith is he who is best of them in conduct, and the best of you are those who are best to their wives." Tirmidhi
Abdullah ibn Amr reported that the Prophet (saw) said, "The whole world is a provision, and the best object of benefit of the world is the pious woman." Muslim
Motherhood, Fatherhood and Children
Part of the family structure involves the birth of offspring. Once a married couple have children, the strong familial bond and the relationship they heve with their child is defined and regulated according to the shari'ah. Both the mother and father have responsibilities to their children, and the children too have responsibilities to their parents.
The Role of the Mother:
The role of the wife as a mother not only includes the rearing of the and protecting of the children, but also to teach the children the true deen.
The Prophet (saw) said, "Every child is born into Islam, its parents later on making it a Jew or a Christian or a Pagan."
Anas reportaed that the Prophat (saw) said, "Be generous to your children, and excel in teching them the best of conduct." Ibn Majah
The reward for the mother for the sacrifices she makes and the efforts she spends for the sake of looking after and rearing her children are great.
Anas narrated that Sallamah, the nurse of Ibrahim said to the Prophet (saw), "Oh Rasul Allah, you brought tidings to men but not to women." He said, "Did your women friends put you up to asking me this question?" She said. "Yes, they did." He said, "Does it not please any of you that if she is pregnant by her husband and he is satisfied with her that she receives the reward of one who fasts and prays for the sake of Allah? And when the labour pains come none in heaven or earth knows what is concealed in her womb to soothe her. And when she delivers, not a mouthful of milk flows from her and not an instance of child's suck, but that she receives, for every mouthful and every suck, the reward of one good deed. And if she is kept awake by the child at night, she receives the reward of one who frees seventy slaves for the sake of Allah." Tabarani.
The Role of the Father :
The emphasis here for the father with regard to his children is the he should provide for them all the material support that they require until they are able to fend for themselves. Islam encourages kind treatment of the children by the father, and recomends good relations be kept between them.
A man man named al-Aqra ibn Habis visited the Prophet (saw) and was surprised to see him kissing his grandsons, Hasan and Husayn. "Do you kiss your children," he asked, adding that he had ten children and never kissed one of them. The Prophet (saw) replied, "That shows that you have no mercy and tenderness at all. Those who do not shpw mercy to aother will not have Allah's mercy shown on them."
Ibn Abbas narrated that the Prophet (saw) said, "There is no Muslim, whose two daughters reach the age (of maturity), and he is good to them as a companion, and they do not cause him to enter paradise." Ibn Hibban.
The role of the Children to their Parents:
Islam enjoins that children are respectful to their parents and treat them with kindness and affection. The child must obey his or her parents. This obedience falls into two categories:
1. Issues which are the right of the parent : These include areas which are of the concern to the parents themselves such as to serve the mother or father. For a woman whose father is her Wali (guardian) it is the father's right that she seeks his permission to go out of the house, and she must obey this and all the rights he has as her Wali. In all these cases, it is Fard (obligatory) for the child to obey.
2. Issues which are the right of the child : These include areas which are the concern of the child him or herself, such as what thay should eat, who they should marry, etc. In these cases, it is recommended for the child to obey the parents.
However as is the case when the husband orders his wife, if the parent orders the child to obey them in something that is a disobedience to Allah (swt), like to do something Haram or to neglect a Fard, then it neither obligatory of recomended for the child to obey. Rather, in these cases, it is haram for the child to obey.
"And we have enjoined upon man to be good to his parents. In travail upon travail did his mother bear him. And in years twain was his weaning : (Hear the command) 'Show gratitude to Me and your parents : To me is (your final) goal. But if they strive to make you join worship with me things of that which you have no knowledge, obey them not." [TMQ 31, 14-1]
Conclusion
This is an outline of the Social system of the Islamic state. The Shari'ah clearly defines the way that men and women should interact with each other and how they should regulate their relationships. Such guidelines are largely absent in societies of the west, be they geoverned by Capitalist or Socialist ideologies. Instead, the need to put down a policy for interaction between men and women is ignored as if it is unimportant. The consequences of this in society are disastrous.
It leads to exploitation of men and women in all areas of society. Social problems are rife, such as prostitution, widespread abortion, sexually transmitted diseases, rape, adultery, pornography - these are but a few of the issues that arise in any society which has a man-made social system.
Under Islam, the correct roles for men and women are defined by Allah (swt) the creator of men and women. The mentality of "freedom" that prevails in the west is replaced by one of responsibility and mutual respect. This notion is apparent in the way in which men and women behave in their social conduct.
These roles, and the systems which regulate them are manifested not only in the conduct of the individuals, but are also implemented by the ruling system, such that there becomes a complete harmony between the beahaviour of the people and the functioning of the environment around them.
This has the effect of elevating the situation of the people from the level of animals (as is the case in the west), to one where the dignity and honour of all human beings is preserved and respected (as would be the case in an Islamic state).
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